Posted on: February 9, 2010 by Terri
Sometimes best laid plans just don’t work out and these plans need to change or die. When we sense a change, how do we know it’s God wanting the change and not us wanting to change because things aren’t going our way or we’re bored or frustrated? I struggle with this a lot. After all, Jesus turned the world upside down in 3 years. Wouldn’t anything he’s at the center of do the same thing? I know it sounds corny, but I truly want to be part of leading women in a radical movement for Jesus! That said, should I be regularly analyzying, re-thinking, and second guessing what I believe God wants me to do?
Since I don’t have any answers right now and the desire to lead something radical isn’t leaving my soul, what I need to do is pray these words from Psalm 139:23-24…
Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Posted on: January 15, 2010 by Terri
I’ve just started doing the On Demand workouts with Jillian Michaels. For those of you who know me, you know that tight abs, muscular arms and a trim physique have always been a struggle for me to achieve. During this morning’s workout, Jillian said something that made sense. She said, “You can’t phone it in, you have to do the work!” Her comment made me think about the areas in my life where I have done the work. The results do come.
I made the decision to follow Jesus some 10 years ago which for me meant committing to do the work - the work of developing my relationship with him, reading and learning the Bible, serving in my church, giving my money and sharing my faith with others. I could have just walked out of the baptism tub and returned to the day-to-day, but I wanted so badly to change who I was! I wanted self-esteem, I wanted to accept and see other people the way God did instead of judging them, I wanted to contribute to something significant, I wanted others to get the same new life I’d been given.
Whether it’s spiritual growth or exercise, the work isn’t easy; it takes time and priority adjustments. The person I was 10 years ago is pretty much gone. I think my family and friends would agree. The hard work has gotten me amazing results. The physical changes are coming a bit more slowly, but Jillian’s comment encouraged me to continue to do the work in both areas of my life.
Phoning in our desire to change isn’t an option. We need to do the work.
Tags: acceptance, clear, God, heart, jesus, Relationship, study, Women Filed Under: Bible, Connecting with God, Faith, Prayer, Relationships, Women
Posted on: December 9, 2009 by Terri
Isn’t that the title of a rock and roll song? As our CLEAR leadership team continues to think and pray and talk about all the things we want for women, these words keep coming to my my mind - girls, girls, girls. There are little girls, young girls, girls becoming women and women, like me, who like being referred to as a girl! For our team, age isn’t an issue; we want to come alongside all women and help them navigate through the waters of the Christian faith! We keep coming back to what we want most for all girls, young and old, - their own personal relationship with Jesus that transforms their lives.
2010 is almost here and we’ve planned a year full of opportunities for women to be challenged, to be inspired, to bring their friends, to meet other women, to serve other women and to pursue spiritual growth. We want all of you to come along as we continue the journey of becoming amazing women of God!
Watch this blog, talk to me (Terri Stone), Diane Karchner, Becky Preston, Renae Stone or Jennifer Thompson. We’re the CLEAR leadership team and we’re here to help you connect with God and each other and to help you grow in your faith. What are you waiting for? Jump in and be part of what God’s going to do in the lives of so many women!
Tags: Christianity, clear, Faith, friendship, God, individuality, jesus, Relationship, Women Filed Under: Christianity, Community, Influence, Leadership, Relationships, Women
Posted on: December 1, 2009 by Terri
The very words piqued my interest in late September. When this news special was announced on The Today Show, I was eager to listen to what Maria Schriver had to say. Reading Maria’s article at www.awomansnation.com shed some light on why she chose to do this study on women and how women are changing the landscape of the United States.
Maria’s mother was her role model - a woman who wore pants when women didn’t, she smoked cigars and worked outside the home. She says her mother raised her exactly like her brothers to believe she could do anything saying, “Maria, this may be a man’s world, but you can and will succeed in it.”
Out of her upbringing and more recently as the first lady of the state of California, Maria’s Women’s Conference was born. Her goal was to create a meeting place where women from all walks of life could come together and share experiences, information and motivate one another. When the 2008 conference sold out in 2 hours she knew something big was happening. Every workshop was packed with women wanting more. What did she learn? She learned that women are hungry for what’s missing in their lives - a place to connect! They feel isolated, invisible, stressed and misunderstood.
I’m certain the Women’s Conference is amazing, what it offers, its size, its celebrity. The lineup of speakers and workshop facilitators is unbelievable. I’m thrilled there’s a movement like this out there. Heck, I want to go! It’s about time women and men unite to bring attention to the inequalities that have existed for way too long, and further they’re working hard to do something about them.
Diane and I have dreamed, prayed, discussed and labored over the last few years hoping to create a Christian women’s movement like Maria’s through CLEAR. What’s different about what we’re doing is that it’s based on women having a relationship with God first and from that becoming deeply connected to one another, sharing burdens, influencing others, finding their voices and making significant contributions in their homes, churches, jobs and communities.
Women, we have the best advocate for equality and change that ever lived! We have Jesus. He came to breakdown all the barriers created from the fall of humanity and to give us what we need to bring about world change. The bottom line is that all the great speakers, workshops and money in the world don’t make a difference if they’re not based on helping women develop and grow in a relationship with Jesus. Why? Why, because there’s no eternal significance without him.
Imagine what we could do if we became razor focused on following Christ the way he asked us to and by uniting in a movement that would develop, encourage, empower and challenge women to make the world what God wants it to be!
Posted on: November 15, 2009 by Terri
It’s hard for me to not take “it” personally, especially when “it” comes to my work. My entire life I’ve loved working. My love for my work started with a few lucrative babysitting jobs, Orange Julius all through high school, managing a real estate office, corporate sales and marketing a few years later and today as the Director of Involvement at Christ’s Church of the Valley. No matter the position, I’m passionate about serving people, building relationships with co-workers and improving the environment in the workplace through my contributions.
The last few weeks I’ve heard a lot of criticism and complaints about areas I lead at the church. What’s worse is I didn’t hear the feedback directly. Boy, was I defensive, confused, hurt, jealous, angry. I kept thinking over and over, “Why didn’t these people come and tell me? They know me. They know how much I want things to be better.”
All week, my facebook posts reflected my reactions to this feedback. All the character flaws I constantly work on, rooted their ugly little heads - jealousy, anger, judgment.
If it weren’t for two good friends, I’d probably still be wallowing in it all. Today’s a better day; God was gracious enough to give me the time I needed to put everything in proper perspective. I realized I don’t have any control over people’s perceptions and the fact that they shared with others instead of sharing with me.
One friend reminded me that my dependence and focus on Jesus are what have kept me grounded in times like these. What’s most important is following him, serving him and others and letting him do the work through me. People are people, me included. We are works in progress. The only things I have control over are the things I say and do and how I exemplify Jesus to others. These are the things I should take personally!
Posted on: November 1, 2009 by Terri
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” - Matthew 11:28-20
This is one of my favorite passages from the Bible. Many years of my life were spent feeling weary and burdened that was until I began following Jesus and believing in what these words mean.
I told a couple of people last week that I was weary, tired and running on empty. As much as I love ministry, I sometimes find myself frustrated, disappointed, irritated and wondering why it has to be so hard.
Ministry’s hard because it’s all about people. We’re complicated, set in our ways, wounded, arrogant, doubtful, side-tracked and unmotivated. What I do becomes difficult because I’m one of those people who sees everything in black and white, right or wrong, which leaves me perplexed at times. I also happen to be a highly-driven perfectionist who will work non-stop to get it all done and get it done right! These traits, unfortunately, give me a narrow viewpoint when I’m under a great deal of stress.
How I’m “wired up” leads to being weary and burdened, but only when I keep Jesus at arm’s length. I end up experiencing weariness when I lose sight of the fact that God is using me to do his work, not mine! It’s so easy to forget that God’s in control, not me.
These times of unrest always pass thanks to the help of friends in ministry and out reminding me that Jesus is there every step of the way guiding, supporting and reaching to me. I just have to remember to reach back and find in him what I need.
Tags: Bible, friendship, God, jesus, Relationship, teaching, trust, Women Filed Under: Bible, Connecting with God, Faith, Growth
Posted on: October 15, 2009 by Terri
I’m sure most of us have taken the “Myers Briggs” somewhere along the way, in school, the workplace, at church - you know, the results give you four letters that describe your personality: E or I, N or S, F or T, J or P. There are 16 different personality types. I’m an ESFJ through and through - Extraverted, Sensing, Feeling, Judging. Here’s how an ESFJ is described:
Warmhearted, conscientious, and cooperative. Want harmony in their environment, work with determination to establish it. Like to work with others to complete tasks accurately and on time. Loyal, follow through even in small matters. Notice what others need in their day-by-day lives and try to provide it. Want to be appreciated for who they are and for what they contribute.
Gifts refer to the spiritual gifts I received when I made Jesus the leader and forgiver of my life and was baptized. My top 3 spiritual gifts are evangelism, teaching and leadership.
My passion centers on people. What makes my heart beat fast is helping people meet and form a relationship with Jesus, coming alongside them as they learn about him and connecting them into the life of the church. I love doing these things, just love them!
These descriptions all look good on paper, but in reality it’s not always that peachy! The last couple of months have been extremely stressful for me at work. I know, I know, most would say, “how can working for the church be stressful?” It can be. While my personality is described as this warm and fuzzy, upbeat, team player who goes around all day making sure everybody’s needs are met, when things aren’t working out so harmoniously, my deadlines are impacted by others, and I get verbally roughed up by a co-worker, I’m like a volcano that grumbles and heats up and eventually erupts thousands of feet into the air. And what comes out is just as hot and dangerous as what comes out of a real volcano! What’s more difficult, is that I want to speak up, work it out, and explain myself, but most of the time I can’t do it. I can’t do it because, for years, I’ve been told I’m too emotional, unapproachable, too black & white, overly upset. If I’m quiet, others can’t say or think those things about me which is what an ESFJ wants - harmony!
My volcano erupted last night and it wasn’t good! Two people I love and trust said I need to figure out how to STOP letting stuff impact me so deeply and so personally. Yeah, I know that, but boy is it hard to put into practice. They also told me the only thing I can control and change is me. They’re right again.
So today’s a new day. I’m up doing what brings me comfort and hope - reading my Bible, talking to God and writing it down. Prayer, Jesus’ words, and time alone always bring the start of change and healing; the continued growth toward Christlikeness.
Tags: Bible, change, Faith, God, individuality, jesus, love, Relationship Filed Under: Bible, Connecting with God, Faith, Growth, Prayer, Relationships
Posted on: October 7, 2009 by Terri
My stepdad told my husband last night that he improved his golf game when he stopped telling himself to not do something, like “Don’t swing this way” “Now, don’t stand like that this time.” Instead, he began telling himself, “I’m going to hit the ball like this, etc.” My mom’s struggled the last several years with diabetes, cataracts, heart issues and breast cancer. You’d never know she had any of these things to talk to her. Why? She says, “Why not me?” “I’m just going to deal with whatever and live my life, everything’s great!” On the other hand, my 87 year old grandma constantly comments on how she wishes my grandpa was still alive; he’s been dead almost 29 years. She says she’s an orphan because no family’s around her, we should live her sad life, on and on. Such different views on life!
I’ve spent the last few days in Colorado visiting my family which has been great fun and troubling at the same time. My folks are wonderful and I’ve enjoyed my time with them. My old gram, as I’ve always called her, seems so hopeless. I keep thinking over and over what a difference state of mind makes in how we see the world and how we see ourselves in the world.
I know we’re all wired up differently. I’ve heard some say, “This is the way I am; I can’t change.” And, yes, some have real medical conditions, like depression, that impact how they are. Even so, I wonder can we intentionally change our state of mind when it has us in a really bad place? I believe we can, but I think the issue is desire. Do we really want to change how we think, feel and approach everything in our lives?
I’ve always been the type of person on the edge of the “everything sucks” state of mind. This is why I’ve had to work very hard the last several years at changing how I view my life! I had to work on changing because I was miserable always wallowing in the muck and mire. Thank goodness my ever-growing relationship with Jesus and some really supportive, honest friends and family members helped me change the thoughts in my head.
I’m glad I’m here in Colorado, with my family, as it’s stirred something inside me. My time here has given me the desire to help my grandma like others have helped me and to be like my folks as I grow older.
